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by
For about the hundredth time, Jim ran his fingers over the small black velvet box in his pocket. The custom job had just barely been delivered on time, and Jim had had to race the clock to get to the jeweler before they closed. He'd made it with only a few moments to spare. But, he'd been so impressed with the execution of the design that he'd gone ahead and put in the order for the rest of the set to be made.
He knew as he fingered the box that Blair was hoping that Jim would remember his birthday--but he wasn't expecting it. The Guide had been dropping a few hints; not many, that wasn't Blair's style, but Jim picked them up. He just hoped that tonight he'd finally have the chance to tell Blair the truth--that he loved his Guide, without reservation.
On the drive home, Jim dug out his cell phone and dialed the loft, waiting impatiently for Blair to pick up. When he finally answered, Jim silently exhaled a sigh of relief. "Chief, get dressed. We're going out to dinner."
"But Jim, I already started--" protested Blair.
Jim interrupted. "Put it in the fridge, take a shower and get dressed. I made reservations last week for tonight. Now, are you coming or do I start looking for another date?" *I can't believe I'm flirting with Blair Sandburg!*
Blair was stunned. *I can't believe Jim Ellison is flirting with me! * Only in his wildest and most private fantasies did Jim flirt with him, which almost always led to more. "Are we going out on a date, Jim?" he asked, flirting back with his Sentinel. Whenever Jim flirted, Blair flirted back and usually Jim never knew what to say.
"Only if you're dressed by the time I get home," Jim countered. "I've got just enough time to jump in and out of the shower myself, so be out of the bathroom when I get there." *Well, at least he didn't completely freak out about it,* Jim thought ruefully. Blair had reacted the way Blair always did--flirting back. This was the first time he allowed himself to think that it might lead to more.
"Where are we going?" Blair asked, wondering what to wear.
"Wear the blue suit, you know, the one that Cassidy said brings your eyes out," Jim replied, skimming through traffic on his way to the loft. "I'll be home in about fifteen minutes."
"All right, see you then. Drive safe, Jim," Blair cautioned.
"I always do," Jim answered before hanging up. *He looks too damn good in that blue suit; now if I can just convince him to leave his hair down.*
/////
Jim had hung up before Blair could make a comment about Jim's supposedly safe driving. *Fifteen minutes; I better hurry in the shower,* Blair mused, putting the pot with the half-cooked chicken into the refrigerator. He sprinted over to the bathroom, chucking his clothes off as he turned on the water, running his fingers through his hair. *Won't be able to pull it back; it won't be dry enough,* he mused as he started to shampoo and then rinse his hair and scrub his body. *Since when did Jim make reservations for anything, much less in advance?* Blair sighed; might as well talk out loud since Jim wasn't home and it always helped him think it out. "I mean, Jim *never* makes reservations; he just drives through and takes out!" He stood under the spray and let it rinse the soap out of his hair and off his skin. "There's got to be something going on. He's taking me out to dinner on my birthday; he's either going to really surprise me, and remember it's my birthday, or have it for some other reason and completely forget it." That was the more likely explanation; there was a completely different occasion and Jim had forgotten his birthday. "Oh yeah, then why did he call you his date and tell you he was taking you out?" Blair asked himself. "Okay, so maybe he is surprising me with dinner for my birthday, I mean, just because Jim's dense sometimes doesn't mean he's thoughtless, right?"
"Right," confirmed the Sentinel's voice from the hallway. "Yes, Chief, it's your birthday present and if you don't get out of the shower we're going to be late."
"Shit! Jim, how long have you been out there?" Blair demanded, scrambling out of the shower and reaching for the towel that Jim was smugly holding out. He didn't even stop to realize that Jim was seeing him naked, he just grabbed the towel and wrapped it around his waist.
"Long enough to find out you think I'm dense," Jim said with a grin as he pulled off his shirt. "Out, Chief." The sight of Blair's naked dripping body brought Jim to full hardness in seconds, and he hid his erection by stripping as quickly as he could while Blair was slamming the door. Leaning against the wall of the shower, Blair's scent was still strong in the shower, but Jim could tell the young man hadn't jacked off as he sometimes did. *He didn't but I may before this is all over!* He let his hand drift down to caress himself, but didn't take the time to finish as he quickly showered. He didn't want anything to interfere with this night, and he figured he could suffer with the hard-on. *Let him see it--let him see how much I want him,* Jim thought to himself.
Blair was in his bedroom, pulling his suit out of the closet before it dawned on him. *Jim saw you, knucklehead! He was standing in the bathroom door handing you your towel and giving you a good once-over! * He shivered at that thought. *Apparently he liked what he saw or he wouldn't have looked!* His thoughts were still screaming as he got dressed and dried out his mop of hair. It was still damp, and would not be pulled back. "Oh, well. it'll have to do," he said, running a brush through it.
"You look fine, Chief."
"Christ, what is this, sneak up on Blair and give him a heart attack day?" Blair shouted, dropping the hairbrush. Jim's hand shot out and caught it before it hit the floor and offered it to the Guide. "Thanks. Jim." Blair stumbled over his words as he caught a look at his friend, wrapped only in a small towel and still damp from the shower. "Nice outfit, man."
Jim actually flushed at that. "Very funny, Blair. I'm going to go get dressed; I'll be down in a few minutes." He ducked back into the bathroom long enough to pull the black velvet box out of his discarded pants pocket as he got into his own blue suit, and slipped the box into his coat. "There you are, baby. I think tonight's gonna be your night." He walked down the steps and caught a look at Blair unawares. The young Guide was leaning against the banister, his eyes bright and shining as he chewed on his bottom lip. Jim wanted so badly to chew that lip for him. "Ready to go, Chief?"
Blair looked up to see his partner also dressed in a suit, dark blue that brought out his eyes. "Wow, Jim, you look snazzy."
"You don't look so bad yourself," Jim countered. He had to stop himself from saying *Delicious.* "Come on, we're gonna be late if we don't hurry."
"Where are we going?"
"Palazzo Androvos," Jim answered as he opened the door and ushered Blair out to the car.
"Androvos! I've been dying to try that place, Jim, but do you know what that place is like!"
"Why do you think I set up reservations for us last week, Chief?" Jim asked, getting into the truck and waiting for the Guide to join him. "I came home and saw the line and called ahead and made 'em. Happy birthday, Blair."
"Wow," is all that Blair could say as they drove along. *When did I step into the Twilight Zone?? Jim has never been this way before! There has got to be something up, he has got to be wacked out or something! First the flirting, then he called it a date, then the bathroom and the bedroom; if I didn't know better I'd say Jim was trying to get into my pants!* "Man, this is great! I never thought you'd take me out to dinner."
"Hey, this is a date remember?" Jim teased. "I always take my dates out for dinner. No movie, though."
"Come on, I've been dying to see Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon and it's finally playing at the Rialto!"
"Is that another one of those subtitle flicks?" Jim rolled his eyes as he pulled into the restaurant parking lot.
"Yeah, but it's great. It's kung fu, you'll love it."
"No thanks, I'll take a pass." He patted his pocket to make sure the present was still there, and got out to open the door for Blair. "This way, please." Jim didn't quite offer his arm to Blair, but that was the underlying intent of his words.
*No way. man, this is like so surreal!* Blair got out and followed Jim into the restaurant, passing by the waiting line to get to the hostess' table.
"Reservation, Ellison, for two," Jim said tersely, and waited while the hostess tracked it down. For a brief moment his stomach twisted, what if something had gone wrong after he'd called and confirmed and everything. But then the hostess smiled.
"Yes, sir, Mr. Ellison, if you'll follow me please," she said, carrying two menus. Jim's sigh of relief was almost audible. "How's this?" she asked, indicating the shadowy booth.
"Perfect," Jim said softly. "It's great, thanks." He pulled off his coat and sat across from Blair, who'd already slid in and was looking at the menu.
The hostess nodded to another woman who came over. "My name is Elise, I will be your waitress this evening; can I get you a drink while you're looking?"
Blair looked over at Jim. "You're driving, right?" At Jim's nod, he smiled. "Great. Yeah, I'll have an ouzo, and. Jim, beer?" Another confirming nod from the Sentinel. "And Corona in a iced glass."
The waitress wrote their drinks down. "I'll be right back with your drinks," she said with a grin.
Blair looked through the menu. "I'm not going to drink that much, Jim, but this is the genuine ouzo. Not some American knockoff, the real thing."
Jim laughed softly. "It's your birthday, Chief. Anything you want, you got." He sat back as the waitress poured the beer in his mug, and then took a sip, watching the anticipation in Blair's eyes. The ouzo was strong enough that he could smell it on his side of the booth, but the kid chugged it down. At least, he intended to. Instead, he chugged about two swallows and found out that it was stronger than he'd anticipated, and pushed the glass to the side, his eyes watering. Jim pulled out his handkerchief, and slid it across the table to Blair. "Here, kid. you're crying," he said softly.
Blair almost choked on the first gulp of Greek wine. It was stronger than anything he was used to, and it made his eyes water. "Thanks," he strangled out as he grabbed Jim's handkerchief and dried his eyes with it. He felt like his throat was on fire, and Jim silently pushed his beer glass over to Blair, who took several cooling swallows. "Thanks again, man."
The waitress walked back up to their booth. "Have you decided on an entrée or do you need more time?" she asked, smiling at Jim.
"Can we have a few more minutes?" Jim asked, eyeing Blair. "No appetizer," he added, stalling her next question.
"I'll check back with you in just a few minutes," she said, and departed once more.
Jim turned back to look at Blair, who seemed to be recovering, slowly sipping his drink. "Feeling better?"
"Yeah, man. sorry about that, I wasn't expecting it to be that strong." Blair grinned. "You know, that waitress is giving you the come hither look."
"Which I am trying to ignore," Jim said pointedly. "I didn't come to pick up a date, I came to enjoy one."
That brought a second flush to Blair's face, and the Sentinel sat back, sipping his beer and looking through the menu. After a few quiet moments of contemplation, both men set their menus down, and the waitress returned. "Ready to order?" Jim nodded. "Same ticket or separate?"
"Sep--" Blair started, but Jim's glare stopped him mid-syllable.
"Together," Jim said, and the waitress smiled again. "I'd like the Greek Chicken with extra cheese, a Greek salad, and tea."
"I'd like the spetsiota--snapper, please--a Salata Marouli, and tea also please, extra sweet."
The waitress finished their order and took their menus, and that left Jim and Blair alone in their booth. There was a single muted lamp over their booth that flickered dimly, but they were on a raised dais, which gave them a small measure of privacy. Jim fingered the box in his pocket as Blair stared at him. "What?" the Sentinel finally asked softly.
"You took me out to a special place for dinner and you won't let me pick up the check. what's up, Jim?" He steepled his fingers and gazed at his friend.
"It's your birthday," Jim said quietly. Since Blair had handed him the opening, he pulled the box out of his pocket and slipped it across the table to sit in front of Blair. "Speaking of which. happy birthday."
Blair looked at the box for a moment. Black velvet with a hinge in the back; the kind you got from a jeweler. "Jim."
"Open it before you say anything," Jim pled softly. He'd laced his own fingers together so his Guide would not see them shaking.
"I can't, man, it's too much, whatever it is. This dinner is enough, Jim, I don't need a lot of stuff to know you care."
Jim's breath caught in his throat. He tried to say something, but his throat wouldn't work. Instead, Jim took a gulp of his beer, and tried again. "What if I more than care?" he finally whispered out, too soft for his non-Sentinel friend to hear.
Blair shook his head. "I didn't catch that, man, you're gonna have to speak up."
"What if I more than care, Blair?" Jim asked softly, but this time loud enough to be heard. One hand was fisted around his beer mug, the other sitting on the table.
"More than. Jim?" Blair looked up to gaze into Jim's blue eyes. "Don't look away, man," he said, when Jim tried to drop his eyes. Instead, Jim merely blinked as he stared into Blair's deep eyes. *He's scared.* "Come on, Jim. be honest." He reached out and put his hand over the one Jim left laying on the table, feeling the Sentinel shake.
"Open the box," Jim said. He knew that once he had, no more words would be needed. Honesty at last. When Blair made no move to open it, Jim did. He reached out, picking up the black box and opening it. He paused, looking at the silver object inside, and then turned it around, offering it to Blair. Blair looked at the ring, nestled inside the black velvet. A Cascade PD badge had been painstakingly recreated in miniature and mounted on the silver band. "Take it out," Jim whispered, and Blair carefully pulled it free of the box. On the right side of the band, the date had been engraved on it. On the left side, a different date--March 20, 1996. "The day we first met," Jim explained, seeing Blair's attention caught by that date. "And tonight's date." Blair didn't have to try it on; he knew it would fit, Jim would have made sure of it. His fingers were shaking as he tried to slide it on his right hand. "No. wrong hand, Blair. let me."
"Jim." Blair's voice was longing. He'd asked Jim for honesty and this was as honest as it came; the raw emotion in Jim's eyes and voice combined with the intensity that radiated from him; Blair was vanquished and they both knew it.
Jim's own hand was shaking as he took the ring from Blair and slipped it over the Guide's left ring finger. "Say yes?"
"To what?" Blair asked. His first instinct had been to agree to anything that Jim wanted, but his brain had to know before it would let his heart free once and for all.
"To loving me and being loved by me," Jim said, not letting Blair's hand go. Suddenly it didn't seem to matter they were in the middle of a public place. Suddenly, nothing else existed in Jim's world but Blair, and waiting for Blair's answer. "To being with me the rest of our lives, no matter what because nothing can come between us." His thumb rubbed Blair's hand.
Blair's world spun. Jim was proposing to him on his birthday in the middle of the restaurant. "Tell me it's not the ouzo," Blair said softly. "Tell me what you're saying."
"I'm saying I love you. I'm asking you to love me, to let me love you. To let me spend the rest of my life loving you and doing anything in my power to make you happy."
Elise brought their food, but sensitive to the tense atmosphere that surrounded the booth, she delivered the plates quickly and departed without a word.
Blair mulled over Jim's words while the waitress provided the brief interruption. It was everything he'd ever wanted from Jim. Partnership, friendship, and love. "Yes," he finally said, when the woman had departed. "Jim. yes."
The smile that lit up Jim Ellison brightened the entire booth. He got up and slid into the booth beside Blair, who was glad to let the large man embrace him. Jim held Blair tightly to him until he heard the young man's stomach rumble. "Let's eat, Chief. Then if you really want to, we'll go and see that subtitle movie."
Blair shook his head. "Let's go home after dinner," Blair said, and leaned in to whisper to Jim. "If you're serious about this, Jim, then I want to take you home and unwrap you."
Jim shivered. "Do you know how long I've thought about that? About seeing you in my bed, knowing that's where you belong? It was so hard, waking up every morning and knowing you weren't where you belonged."
Blair's eyes blurred as he listened to Jim talk. "Jim. you don't know how long I've wanted you to say these things. How long I've felt this way and never said. because I was afraid to lose what I did have with you."
"We were both stupid to fear that," Jim said, raising Blair's eyes to look into his. "I was afraid that if you knew I loved you you'd leave, just like everyone else I ever cared about, and I wanted to be satisfied with what we were, and I couldn't be. Every time I saw you, heard you, smelled you, I wanted you--I wanted us!"
"Us. God how I love the sound of that." Blair put his fork down and put his hand on Jim's face. He didn't care who saw. "Jim. I haven't.."
"Neither have I," Jim reassured him. "But I know the basics; we can handle it together."
"Together. that's another one I like."
"Us, together, we, partners, friends, mates?" Jim reeled off the list of words, but his tone was questioning on the last one.
"Yeah. mates," Blair confirmed. And got another booth-brightening smile. He raised his hand to run his fingertips over Jim's mouth. "I never want you to lose that smile, Jim. it makes you radiant."
Jim caught Blair's hand and pressed a fevered kiss to it. "No. you make me radiant, Blair, you do. being with me, around me, not ashamed of me. That makes me shine, because finally, I've found someone who doesn't try to hide what I am. You embrace it, and by doing that, me as well. You don't make me ashamed of what I am anymore. you let me live."
Blair did start crying then, and Jim pulled Blair to his chest. "Don't cry, Blair, please. This is a happy occasion; it's not every day I find the man I love."
"Hell of a birthday present, Jim," Blair managed with a smile as Jim dried his tears.
"It's only half over," Jim said, his arm around Blair's waist as they turned back to their meals. "You said it yourself, you still have one more present to unwrap. Tell me, Chief. are you on top or bottom?"
Blair's breath caught as he choked on his fish. Jim was actually giving him a choice? But he still knew what he wanted. "I want you to take me, Jim, I already belong to you heart and soul; I want to belong to you in every way."
This time it was Jim who was speechless. He was touched by Blair's desire to be a part of him, to be with him. "You will, I promise you." He ran his finger down Blair's arm, and felt the heat through the thin cotton of his shirt. "You're warm, baby," Jim whispered deliberately.
"You called me baby," Blair whispered, amazed.
"It's how I've been thinking of you," he confessed. "As in baby, I'm never gonna let you go."
"I can live with baby," he responded happily. "But now I've got to think of one for you. lover," he said silkily. He felt the tremor in Jim's body at that. "Lover it is, then." The tremor repeated, more pronounced. "Jim?"
"Just thinking. dreaming. imagining. anticipating." Jim smiled. "When we are lovers."
"Soon," Blair promised him. "And always."
"Always," echoed Jim. Always was something he'd never dared to hope for.
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