Disclaimers:
Summary:
Warnings:
Notes:
|
"
by
God I was uncomfortable. Hospital chairs are one step removed from torture devices. My face hurt from being pressed on the wood armrest, My back and arms were twisted and pined in a uncomfortable way, and I was twisted like a pretzel. I looked over at Jim. He was curled up pillow over his ears and eyes. Dam wish I had remembered to bring his earplugs and eye mask. Knowing that he had a hard time sleeping in the hospital. And then I remember. Last night. Jim. Being dragged off. Bound and all but raped
I tried to uncurl carefully but ended up falling on the floor. Got up trying to be quiet. Jim did not move. The IV bag hanging next to the bed was not in Jim's arm. I looked at the Notes on the bag. Dam Codeine. They had given him Codeine. That could explain last night. Man I hurt. I touch Jim's arm. At least his fervor was nearly gone. My arms hurt, my demim jacket was gone. The tee I had on was backwards, inside out. Stepping into the bathroom, an inspection of the rest of my body. I had a bruise on my left side of my face, and scratches on my hands and arms. Unzipping, I found the trace remains of last night I could smell Jim and my self on me, Dried semen. Even if most of it was removed Dirt and grass stains on my jeans. I ached all over, A truly bad hair day I had dirt and grass in my hair. No question that this was real. The question was how was I going to deal with this. Rape. Consent. It had been taken from me the choice of consent. I had been love with my friend for a long, long time. But I knew that nothing could ever happen. Not mister macho Jim Ellison, God this sucked. Why did it have to be like this? And he could not even be upset with Jim. He had been out of his head with fever when he came in and on top of that the drug. He could not have known what he was doing. I splashed water on my face, contemplated jumping in the shower. I so wanted to be clean. Violated. I only wanted to forget what had happened. But that is the last thing that I could let happen. I we had to deal with this. For no reason than Jim had to be aware of what this drug could do to him. And on some level. Some deeply repressed cave man level, He must have wanted me. But punching me? That was so out there for him. Force. Bound. Raped.Violence. I suddenly felt an over whelming urge to vomit. This was so not how I wanted any one. I fought with my stomach. I won but only just. I had to know what had been going on in his head. If I was ever going to trust him. Hell If I was ever going to trust my self. I had wanted him. Hell, I had kissed him. Responded to him, held him, encourage him; shot my load when he did his rub off on me. I might have even told him that I loved him. But I did not remember. Oh god. How was I going to face him? What if he remembered, or worse if he did not? Guild Pain, remorse. I know that we needed to talk, but not now. I wondered what had happened to my Jacket, as I grabbed Jim's leather one, and my back pack and headed back to the loft, to grab a shower and some time. A last look at Jim. He was still curled in a ball; pillow still stuffed over his eyes and ears. Blessed Protector. Some how I had to protect him from this. An urge to drop a kiss on his wide forehead was squelched. By the knowledge that I could wake him, and have to deal with it before I was ready.
**********************************
[ Jim Pov Hospital. Medicated ]
Fire. Fire in the Jungle. Had to get away from the heat. Had to save the tribe. Vines were all around me. Had to tear them away, fight my way out from the cage that was holding me. Trapped.
Had to save him. Waking silent. Have to get out. Fire. Too hot. Blood burning. Boiling. Companion coming. Have to save him. Fire is licking all around us. Have to get out. He doses not see the fire. I have to save him. He is fighting to go back, back into the flames. Have to stop him. I must protect him. He wants to go back to the place of demon fire. I have no choice. He slumps in my arms. And I Cary him away into the safety of the cool night. I will do what I must to protect him from the fire. Protect him from his self.
Fire almost took him once. I stand guard, He is bound and safe. No one will take him. He is safe even from his self.
But the fire has come back for me. It burns and fills. Combusts. My blood is on fire.
I hear him. The firedeamon are after him. The fire licks at him. The fire covers him. I am the fire.
Then we are fire. I taste the fire on him, in him, Burning. I have no choice but To burn with him. His kisses are fire. He gives me leave with his mouth To quench the fire. I taste his need, I smell his want. We are a part of each other.
I can not hurt him. I free him. Comfort him. We save each other in the night. We are a bonfire burning bright.
We strive together, passion filling, building, Fire drips off of us. Flame is in his fingertips. Fire is in his kisses. I taste the smoke in his hair,
And in a moment we are both Consumed.
And the fire that is we fades, And slowly slips away.
Returning. Oh Dear god. What have I done? What have we done? I have a Hospital band on my wrist. Blair is under me. Cant think about that now.
Have to get back. What have I done?
The Sentinel is the property of Pet Fly Productions.
All series, movies and characters are the properties of their respective owners. No infringement of those rights is intended. All fics on this site are the copyrighted property of their respective authors.
Site and design copyright © the other g.m.
All Rights Reserved.
